A QUOTE

To understand what recursion is, you must first understand recursion.

A QUOTE

If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.

The rest of them will write Perl programs.

A CHAT
  • “Knock, knock.”
  • “Who’s there?”
  • very long pause….
  • “Java.”
  • : -o
A CHAT

A doctor, a civil engineer and a programmer are discussing whose profession is the oldest...

  • A doctor, a civil engineer and a programmer are discussing whose profession is the oldest.
  • “Surely medicine is the oldest profession,” says the doctor. “God took a rib from Adam and created Eve and if this isn’t medicine I’ll be…”
  • The civil engineer breaks in: “But before that He created the heavens and the earth from chaos. Now that’s civil engineering to me.”
  • The programmer thinks a bit and then says: “And who do you think created chaos?”
A QUOTE

A void is slightly different to a vacuum. But there’s probably not much in it.

A CHAT

Which programming language should I learn first?

  • To program in an expressive and powerful language: Python
  • To get a website up quickly: PHP
  • To mingle with programmers who call themselves “rockstars”: Ruby.
  • To really learn to program: C.
  • To achieve enlightenment: Scheme.
  • To feel depressed: SQL
  • To drop a chromosome: Microsoft Visual Basic
  • To get a guaranteed, mediocre, but well paying job writing financial applications in a cubicle under fluorescent lights: Java.
  • To do the same thing with certifications and letters after your name: C#
  • To achieve a magical sense of childlike wonder that you have a hard time differentiating from megalomania: Objective C
A QUOTE

A class walks into a hardware store and asks the assistant to pointer him in the direction of a file

A CHAT
  • what did the database say to the unit test?
  • stop mocking me!
A CHAT

How many DBAs does it take to change a light bulb?

  • Three: One to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
A CHAT

How many PHP programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

  • We looked at the light fixture and decided there's no point trying to maintain it. We're going to rewrite it from scratch. Could you wait two months?